self-titled: ^_^

dear readers, a preface to tonight's entry. this is being written without a trace of irony or humor, and if it's dripping with sentimentality, i do apologize, but it's from the heart.

today i went shopping for middlemarch stuff with lori. On the way back, we were travelling along memorial drive, and i thought "hey, i bet othermusic has the notwist in stock" so i had lori drive me over there. Not only would they have the album in stock most likely, but it's new music wednesday, so who knows what was waiting for me. i tried calling just to make sure, but the number wasn't working. Memorial drive was the road i took the first time i went into cambridge, before i knew a better way, and i actually thought about that. Every friday this summer, i'd leave work and drive into that small area of harvard square and drop sometimes upwards of $100 on new CDs. And then i'd come home and unwrap them in this bizarrely exciting ritual, or if it was later in the summer, bring the stack with me into the phone center where I could do the same. And i kept going there when i could this year. T'ing or bussing it, making the trip, and then i'd get there, buy my CDs and then go to starbucks and just chill. Read, write, reflect, listen, just relax. Such great times.

Actually, come to think of it, the very first time i went for the CDs was in June when i went to see the dismemberment plan. I remember going early so that i could kill some time buying records before the show. I bought 3 cds at OM that day: the low & dirty three EP, dump - that skinny motherfucker with the high voice?, and the belle & sebastian jonathan david single. I remember walking into that store, and being knocked back. It was so hip, playing some crazy shit on the store stereo, vinyl lining the walls, racks of CDs of bands I had never heard of. To say it was intimidating would be a gross understatement. But i kept going back, and grew more and more comfortable. I'm on "hey" basis with a lot of the employees, have talked to one a fair amount about shop, sent 5 drunk sophomores in one night to make out with someone working, seen ted leo there, and bought a disgusting amount of new music. this place is an oasis in a vast musical desert. Sure, newbury has SOME stuff, but not enough, would they ever sell some icelandic electronic group's CD? let alone a remix CD of thiers? let alone send me an e-mail raving about said band? Doubt it. Newbury's more interested in sticking the new greenday or johnny eat world cds up front and throwing kitschy pop culture stuff all over the place for impulse buys. I hate that store. No, othermusic is just about the music, about telling me about it, and then making it available to me in store, complete with nice little hand-written information on the cds they are particularly interested in moving.

So we drove up, made the left onto winthrop street, i got ready to jump out of the car and then i saw that all the windows were black and the store was completely empty. i was shocked, i ran up to the door and read the note. "As much as we love the music, selling CDs is a business." The Cambridge location wasn't cutting the mustard. Other Music now exists in one place, the original location in New York City.

A part of me died. I LOVED those trips. Browsing the aisles, finding what i was looking for, picking up things i didn't know were out, finding things i never expected. Shit, one day i was in there and i heard this great little synth pop song that made me smile "you asked me if i listened to journey" and i actually let out a little chuckle. I asked what was playing, "some friends of ours, great stuff huh, they're called the secrets, we'll have a five track next week." I wrote down that name and picked up the Thin Cities EP the next week. That song i heard was "the loneliest duet" a song that from the moment i heard it in store was in love with, a fascination that grew and grew, until this point now where there are few songs that can match the history i have with this four minutes twenty. Memories and associations and feelings and events that have been accumulating for 8 months. And there's no way i'd have ever known about this shit little band if it weren't for OM.

And sure, that's an extreme example, local band that happens to be friends with the store. but still, there's so much i'd have never bought if it weren't for OM having it on their shelves. Stuff i love now, and has become a part of me. AM/FM, Bonnie Billy's more revery, Cex, Death Cab, Dntel, Dump, Eitzel, the Faint, Figurine, Kleenex Girl Wonder, Le Tigre, Mum, Pinback, Silver Jews, Spoon, Superchunk, Whiskeytown... i'[d be lucky if newbury carried 20% of those titles. ANd sure, i could do mail-order, and i will do mail-order. But i guarantee you, if it weren't for these 8 months of physical shopping, who knows where i'd be. I certainly would never mail-order for the white stripes. I will now, but not before, not without this confidence in new music. I needed this period of impulse buying to give me faith in sending away and waiting a week.

i've lost something. will i even go into cambridge now, to hang out in cambridge and catch up on my life without that promise of new music i'm excited for? this sucks. I'll miss that fucking trendy-ass store. And i'm buying a goddam t-shirt to wear around in support.